There are times we desire something consciously, but don't believe it's possible to have it.
There's a belief that's running the show that's keeping us from having what we want.
I'm going to give you a very simplistic example of this to illustrate what I mean.
Years ago, when I first starting following my desires and putting them first (and NOT in the “some day” or the when “I'm fully ready and have enough money” category), I realized that I denied myself even really simple desires.
The biggest ah-ha around this was related to getting a glass of water, something so basic that it really bonked me on the head with its ridiculousness.
I realized I was denying myself water when I wanted it. I would be in the middle of something “more important” and put off taking a brief break to get up and drink a glass of water.
A glass of water!!! Trust me, the absurdity of this was not lost on me.
In that instant when I recognized what I was doing it became clear that this was representative of how I was putting myself off and denying myself in all parts of my life.
I was saying no to my desires (be they simple like a glass of water or grandiose like where I truly wanted to go in my business) because I believed I couldn't have what I desired unless I both worked hard for it and denied myself. Ouch!
I believed that success (what I want) comes from a nose to the grindstone work style. I believed this so fundamentally that I had to deny myself a FREAKING GLASS OF WATER in favor of pushing through the work.
YET, get this… what I really wanted was ease. I wanted that energized peace of being completely in the flow with my life and work BUT I was behaving completely contrary to my desires.
I was saying I want this effortless ease in my life and business but clearly I didn't believe that was possible. If I did, I would be behaving differently and getting different results.
The proof was in the pudding, so to speak. There it was. Glaring evidence of what I truly believed. “No water for you missy until your martyr yourself to your work.”
That was NOT believing in ease.
That was believing in martyrdom.
This kind of clarity is important. When you get clear on the disconnect between your beliefs (what's running the show) and what you consciously desire, you then know exactly where the work needs to be done.
Then you have a choice…
- You can change your desires,
- You can deny your desires, OR
- You can change your beliefs.
Hint: #3 is the way toward effortless ease.